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Monday, February 4, 2013

Happy 8th Birthday, Brigita! (and an adoption date!)

Today is such an important day for me. I've been talking with Brigita about this day for a couple of weeks. We have been singing Happy Birthday already and talking about blowing out candles. My niece and I tried showing her how with dandeelions yesterday. Last year, I was praying and celebrating Brigita's last birthday as an orphan and in an institution. Though she is still technically an orphan, she really isn't. Brigita knows love. She knows a family. She knows that even if this mama has crazy mama moments one minute, she will be snuggling and loving her the next. She is beginning to see that if she gets hurts, I will try to make it better. We were playing on her bed yesterday (she has moved into her own room!) and she ended up hitting her leg on the foot board. She winced and rubbed it, but I immediately swooped in and started making it a big deal. Kissing her leg and rubbing it myself. Brigita laughed! She thought mom's reaction was so funny. But at the same time, she lifted her foot towards me. She sought me out for more. I explained to her that mommies kiss boo boos and make them better. Right now, she is still sleeping as its 1am here. I can't sleep b/c I'm so excited. I have already decorated her chair and hung the Happy Birthday banner. I meant to hang streamers and thought we had some but apparently I don't. I will pick them up tomorrow on my lunch break. We are going to have spaghetti (her favorite) and cake tonight. We will also have a family celebration this weekend for her real party. I will post pics of her when she is actually awake on her birthday later.

Ignore the tinkerbell! We will be getting her a lady bug bed set after we have completely finished with the adoption.
But look at her sleeping in her big girl room!

Tonight has also gotten me thinking of her birth mom and of her actual day of birth. I can't imagine how she must have felt, having had a few miscarriages already and expecting to have a "normal" child. Only, when Brigita was born, her mom would have likely been told of all the "bad" things about Down syndrome. Brigita was born with a rather large hole in her heart (ventricular septal defect). Brigita had jaundice and its likely safe to say that her mother was told Brigita was a sick baby and would likely not live. I can't imagine what her mom was feeling, leaving her baby behind in the hospital. She certainly wasn't old but was nearing her child-bearing years. I'm not sure if she went on to have more children or not. I hope if she truly yearned for Brigita, that she was blessed to have another baby that was healthy. I hate that she was unable to take Brigita home and see what a wonderful little girl she has become. I can only imagine how much more wonderful she would have been with the right love and care from the start. When Brigita was born, there was no school or day care available for children with special needs in her country. The medical care system now is one of the worst in the EU, so I can only imagine what it was like 8 years ago. I hope one day if her mother would like to know what happened to her child, what became of her, that she and I would be able to make that connection. I do not fault her in any way for leaving Brigita in the hospital. Though I do hope it was a hard decision for her. I know that may be wrong of me to wish, but for Brigita, I hope there was pain in leaving her behind. And I pray one day she can see the beauty and life in this wonderful little girl!

 Love my mommy and daughter moments! I think Brigita does too!

And I cannot believe I have not posted yet....but I did receive our adoption court date!! I will have court on February 25th! In God's great glory, this date is also the anniversary of my father's passing (when I was 19) AND the date of my uncle's birthday, who only recently passed away. I am so glad to always remember him on this date as well!

Doesn't she have the cuteest little hands?
They look like her mama's, tiny with short stubby fingers.
Really, mama? Another picture?
Still enjoys swinging! Even on cold days
(though it was only 50-something degrees here today)


  1. There were days when I would stare at Brigita's picture and just pray and pray that someone wonderful would go get her. I am so happy that you were that person. Thank you for loving her and being her momma. She looks so amazing, and obviously loves this new life and loves you :-) Happy Birthday Sweet Girl!

  2. Dee, I hope baby girl had a great birthday! It is overwhelming for me to think about how much has changed since that dark day last year when Steph, Helle, Kelly, and I were all crying for her and praying her next birthday would be different. You were the answer, and what a beautiful answer you are! You are exactly the right Mama for her, and you have given her an amazing, wonderful life!

    By the way, your court date is going to be my birthday present. Feb 25 is my birthday, and wow, that's about the best birthday present ever!

    Please give sweet Brigita hugs and kisses from me and her other "aunties". I can't wait to see the pics from her party! :)

    - Lauren